"And you can tell everybody this is your song"

Today in class Dr. Coyne asked us to think about what our favorite song was and why. At first, it was hard for me to think of only ONE song that could describe myself. Instead of choosing one song, I'm going to choose a time in my life when music meant the most to me. It was the weird and odd stage of middle school when I first heard Avril Lavigne's "Sk8er Boi." Since that moment I started listening to her first album, "Let Go." However, it wasn't until I experience depression for the first time as my dad lost his job, my brother came home early from his mission and it just seemed like my life was falling apart. To ease the pain and sadness I felt, my sister Megan bought me my first CD: Avril Lavigne's "New" album "Under My Skin."

I listened to it all the time and soon knew every song, lyric and order of the track list. Haha, I eventually dressed somewhat like Avril (capri cargo pants, black t-shirts, vans shoes, long/straight hair, some eye-makeup, etc...) Haha, everyone knew me at school as the Avril lookalike. I definitely didn't act like Avril (no swearing, etc...), but I felt that her music spoke my story...my pain. In fact, when I go back to listen to that album not only is it amazing that I still know every word to her songs, BUT I realize how dark a few of her songs are-- in that she gets into how it feels to be sad, angry or lonely. This personal experience from years ago has shown me that music can indeed give us an identity to fall under or help us see the likes and dislikes we have for the world around us. For me, I was a girl who had many guy friends (more than girls), I didn't care too much about how I looked, I searched to lift up those who were misunderstood (who outwardly didn't live the perfect Mormon life), I would strive to be a little out of the ordinary (a little rebellious), and I looked to my emotions to help me find meaning in my life. In many ways, I'm still that person-- and it made me happy and still makes me happy to say I can identify with some music, because I share the same perspectives---it speaks to me. Thank you to SKA, punk-rock and rock music for allowing me to experience those feelings that were at one time bottled up inside of me! Also, a shout out to my older sisters McCall and Megan for giving me opportunities to find myself through Avril concerts, albums and rock-out sessions :)

 PS. I hope you enjoy some Avril music on the blog playlist!

MuSiC

Today's lesson on music has got to be one of my favorites-- it's definitely one I will remember when I reflect on my experiences at BYU. This was especially true when we Dr. Coyne showed us a study on tone vs lyrics. I absolutely thought that a song's tone would influence me a lot more than lyrics. Especially, when at times I love songs, but have no idea what the lyrics are or what they mean. However, a study with Professor Warburton proved me wroooooonnng. He found through an interesting experiment in which he created happy toned- songs with dark lyrics and vice-versa to his experimental group. In the end, the results showed that lyrics attributed more to an individual's aggressive behavior towards others when compared with the tone of the music. As I pondered on the surprising results, I realized that it would make sense for humans to understand and be influenced more by what people are trying to say or the content of communication, rather than the form or appearance of the music or speaking. Obviously, that affects us too, especially our moods and emotions. However, even subconsciously we seem to be socialized or seek meaning through what messages the artists are conveying to us.

This finding has a great meaning or importance to my life as I find myself relating to music today. Today's lesson taught me that I want to be seeking "healthy" or elevating music that can help me move forward. There are great songs in today's music that help me do this like "Gone, Gone, Gone" by Phillip Phillips or "Shake It Off" by Taylor Swift (she has overall great music). On the other hand, there's music that contains high sexual content ("Talk Dirty" by Jason Derulo) and violence. However, I think there's also another genre of music that keeps me from being proactive: Random songs. For the most part, these types of songs don't have an overall meaning or anything--- they have a great beat and are there just for you to listen to.

Such songs are like "I Love It" by Icona Pop or "This Is How We Do" by Katy Perry. I like those songs too, but I find that it's almost as bad, because I'm wasting TOO much time. I'm not saying these songs are necessarily bad or "evil" (I need to "turn my brain off" for a bit), but I think we should be just as cautious about what mindless random junk we listen to as well as violence, drugs and sex. This especially rang true to me after we had peaceful two minutes in class when Hailey (our TA) played a song for us on her violin. In those two minutes I felt entirely at peace, clear and not anxious. It was AMAZING. I reflected on my own music habits and asked myself how many times a day or even a week I had a moment like the one I had in class today. It's a sweet reminder that although I'm more often than not listening to uplifting music with good lyrics, I could also be doing better at making more time for truly peaceful moments with music. I am grateful for this reminder and hope that this next week I can take the time to relax, listen and allow myself to be filled with the power of music.

Mood Enhancers

Today I would like to briefly talk about how television can change or alter your mood! Something I seem to re-learn over and over again is how too much T.V. can make create feelings of restlessness, irritation and short-tempered. It seems after a binge of Netflix shows (currently I'm into Ugly Betty) I am prone to feelings of apathy as I put off my homework for that day, view my husband's actions as annoying and that the consequences of tomorrow won't come. I experienced this last weekend after I watched a few too many episodes of "Ugly Betty," and when my husband asked me if I had done my homework I immediately answered angrily and acted annoyed. I couldn't believe what I had done and realized how much of addiction the television was becoming for me. I got these off of a website for addiction:
Behavioral signs of addiction:

• Drop in attendance and performance at work or school 
• Unexplained need for money or financial problems. May borrow or steal to get it. 
• Engaging in secretive or suspicious behaviors 
• Sudden change in friends, favorite hangouts, and hobbies 

 Psychological warning signs:

•  Unexplained change in personality or attitude 
• Sudden mood swings, irritability, or angry outbursts 
• Periods of unusual hyperactivity, agitation, or giddiness 
• Lack of motivation; appears lethargic or “spaced out” 
• Appears fearful, anxious, or paranoid, with no reason

Now I know I don't have quite a few of these, but some of them sound like me after I repeatedly watch Netflix-- especially the psychological symptoms. This reminded me of a study Dr. Coyne talked about in which a group of students in a classroom hear a researcher-stimulated fight outside the classroom (one person gets "injured"). For the group having watched violent video games minutes before the fight, it took them longer twice as long to respond to the injured person compared to the college students who had played family-friendly video games. 

Overall, maybe there's a deal of aggression that comes from watching television and movies as well as video games. Especially, when we have watched the media source for an extended period of time and if T.V. is being used as a coping mechanism. Addictions can take us on a violent path and I believe that T.V. can be a tool of destruction if we allow ourselves to become slaves to it. 

Double Edged Sword

Wow, it's amazing how fast we recognize the double-edged sword... So you know that show I talking about? The one that I love? Yep, that's it...Parks and Recreation... Well, I've been watching it A LOT lately as I'm getting ready for the last season to air in October, but as I watched an episode yesterday, I realized that there were some things I don't like about it and think may have a profound effect on those who watch it. The culture of dating is a big part of the show, and like most shows these days, there's one or two characters that are kind of sex-crazed, such as Meredith on "The Office" and Daniel from "Ugly Betty." In parks those characters are Tom and Donna, but recently it became a red flag to me when a relaxed attitude of sex was shown in an episode. It shouldn't bother me as it is probably normal for today's adults to have casual sex with a few different partners (or at least, that's what movies and T.V. have cultivated me to think anyway...), but there was a particular scene that blatantly put across the message: Sex means nothing but pleasure--so who cares! Sleep with anyone and everyone, as long as you're getting what you want. As long as it makes you feel better. That strong dialogue and message really hit me and I realized that all the sexual references, although small, were really adding up to create the same meaning that strong sequence had. It made me think of the info processing theory (although they are plenty of theories that could be used to see this). As I watch this episode, I create a memory of this scene, I think about the message that casual sex is harmless especially as I continually watch the show, later I may see a similar situation which in turn activates my memories of the scene, and then I reflect on what I think of casual sex and then go ahead to agree it's harmless or continue to believe it can be harmful. It's almost as if it's excitation transfer theory too as the message throughout the show is portrayed when characters mislabel theirs feelings of friendship or love to mean that they should have sex with the person who may have helped them feel better for one moment. Getting back to the first theory, I have to interpret what this message means to me and if I believe that just because I have a nice moment with a stranger that it's okay to take things further with them. I'm very strong in my personal values and beliefs, but I've noticed that the more I engage in this show, they more I rationalize their behavior and reflect more on how it may be appropriate for young adults to do this today. However, like this blog, it has helped me reflect on the message, realize things similar to it may happen today and know so I can help others who may be experiencing it and guard myself from temptation.

Parks and Recreation

For the next few months I'm going to blog about media I have been exposed to and the effects I see it has on myself. Please feel free to comment or share your opinion! Firstly, I should have blogged last week, and so I'll start there... Just a few weeks before school started my oldest brother introduced me to the world of "Parks & Recreation"-- an Amy Poehler's television series. Previously, I had always thought that it was a 2nd to the television series "The Office." However, after watching a few episodes I absolutely fell in love with Leslie Knope and her crew of friends and rec employees. In fact, I became so obsessed with that show that I watched all 5 seasons on Netflix within a matter of only a few weeks. It's my guilty pleasure, my comic relief and at times, I even feel that it's my best friend. I wasn't sure how to describe this phenomenon until my professor in my Media, Family, and Human Development course explained to us a thing called, "Parasocial Relationships," which is when we create an illusion that we are friends with a fictional character. It's also important to recognize that we more often than not create parasocial relationships in order to fulfill our need to belong, be accepted and identify with another person.

Once I learned about this, I realized that Leslie Knope was my parasocial friend. I enjoyed watching the T.V. show, because she inspired me to be positive and believe in myself. Like a friend, she was honest about my weaknesses and buoyed me up to have dreams and rise up to be a better version of myself. When I reflect on the feelings I'm experiencing as I write this, it's amazing how a fictional character could have such an effect on me. At first, it's silly that this could happen as the whole show is a mockumentary and the characters are over-simplified--it's not reality. However, then I think about Albus Dumbledore from the Harry Potter series, Jane Eyre, Tris Prior from Divergent and other sources of media and realize that we create parasocial relationships with everything! It's not surprising that we would turn to fictional friends for strength, learning and understanding. In a way, our parasocial friend can be one of our best listeners. Also, because most characters are shown to have incredible characteristics like courage, strength, forgiveness, positivity, etc... we can also hear them speak to us and show us how we would like to be. They are our best outlets and voices of inspiration. So for now, I would say this effect has been a positive one in my life, although all media can be a double-edge sword. I won't get into that today, but I guess I want to end with saying that I'm glad that I can always find the good in a world that is gradually becoming darker.